Q & A Table of Contents
My Boss Wants Me To Move With Him, But Isn't Offering Sufficient
Incentive
From: Lynne, Baltimore, Maryland
Question: I am an executive assistant. My boss has accepted a position with
the same company in another state and wants me to go. I submitted my proposal and he came back VERY low. On round two of negotiations we have finally agreed on the salary, and relocation package, but we are in disagreement on the additional bonus needed to cover my personal expenses & risks by agreeing to this move. They say this is exceptional that I am being offered this opportunity for someone in "MY" position. I get the impression he's not going to increase the bonus much more if any. My creative juices have dried up. Any advise? Please respond ASAP!
Response: If what you are calling your 'bonus' covers personal expenses relating to your move to another state, it is not a bonus. It is the price you will have to pay for moving. This is not a gift to you, it is reimbursement of costs you will incur by moving.
Negotiating for reimbursement is quite different from pursuing a bonus. You need to pay attention to the language you are using in the negotiation.
You should take a step back from the negotiation process and develop a well-documented case for the various elements of your compensation package: salary, benefits, and relocation expenses.
Since I have no idea what you mean by your 'personal expenses & risks' what you need to do is outline what those cover and how they are to be measured from a financial standpoint. For example, if you have family responsibilities that you will have difficulty fulfilling if you move away, you may be able to demonstrate that there are specific costs you will incur (hiring help, making frequent visits home, etc.) which are a direct consequence of the move.
In other words, you need to think of the specific effects the move will have on you and how much it will cost. Then you need to find a way to present this to your boss and ask him what he would do to solve your problem; don't ask him a 'yes' or 'no' question -- keep it open-ended. You might ask something like, "What would you do if you were in my shoes."
There's another important point you raise in your question: When you raise the issue of how much right someone in 'your' position has to bargain, if you accept this approach you are allowing your boss to devalue you. He would not have asked you to join him in his new office if he did not consider you valuable. Your rank should not be an issue; your value to him as an essential element of his capacity to do his job is a more appropriate focus.
You should expend some effort to explore your alternatives: are there other jobs within the company, other people with whom you would like to work -- who might treat you with more respect? How about other job opportunities in your current location -- or someplace else you might like to live? Get a sense of your market value. Once you have a sense of the alternatives, that can give you greater confidence in your negotiations.
It is perfectly appropriate to say to your boss, "You know I have been thinking about the deal we have been discussing. Since there are several open issues, we cannot consider it a 'done deal'. Therefore I think we should re-examine several items. One of those is whether you are going to treat me with the same level of respect as offer you. When you respond to my salary and other compensation requests with a low offer, I wonder whether you really want me to join you in your new office or whether you are looking for a way to keep my services without making any investment in me." In effect you need to let him know your feelings -- and that these feelings do have financial elements.
In your negotiations, don't let your emotions rule you. You should rule your emotions. When you feel emotional, that is perfectly okay as long as you figure out how the expression or suppression of those feelings fits into your strategy.
Good luck,
Steve
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