Negotiation Skills Company, Inc.
 
Negotiation Skills Company, Inc.

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He Promised, I’m Depending On Him, He Hasn’t Delivered

From: Lyna, Asheville, North Carolina

Question: My elderly neighbor has verbally agreed to cut down trees on his property that are hanging over my property and threatening to fall on my house. Six months have passed and he has yet to do so.

Now I am wanting to put a privacy fence up but the same trees are hanging so low that it will not be possible until they are cut down. Is there any thing I can do to guarantee that my neighbor will fulfill his promise and soon?

Response: In addition to checking on your legal right to cut down the portions of the trees that overhang your property, you might also want to find out whether your neighbor would have to pay for any damage to your house or any other part of your property caused by his trees. This kind of homework helps you understand your BATNA (Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement) should your discussion with your neighbor fail to yield good results.

You also need to put yourself in your neighbor’s shoes. Is there a financial issue that has held back his capacity to spend the necessary money to remove the trees? Does he value the trees as a means for preserving his privacy? Is his contractor backed-up with orders and thus slow to perform the job? Are there any emotional ties your neighbor may have to some of the trees — his kids used to have a tree house in one, his grandchildren like to climb another, etc.? Thinking of all the possibilities means you can approach your neighbor in a questioning mode rather than confronting him ready for conflict. This can influence the mood of your conversation.

If it happens that the trees protect your neighbor’s privacy, if you let him know of your plans to erect a new fence — and give him a chance to comment on the style or the design — that may increase his enthusiasm for fulfilling his promise.

If he is facing a financial crunch, you may want to work out a deal with him — where you advance the money and he signs a document that guarantees to pay you back — even if the payback is based on a lien on his house.

So do your homework about your rights, think about your alternatives, and be creative and diplomatic in your discussions with your neighbor. Find out what will convince him to fulfill his initial agreement — then offer him a reason to fulfill his promise.

Good luck,
Steve

The Negotiation Skills Company, Inc.   P O Box 172   Pride's Crossing, MA 01965, USA   
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