Q & A Table of Contents
I’ve Inherited A Grudge Match
From: Marnie, Cloverdale, Indiana
Question: I started a position in a small, satellite law office. I
am one of two legal assistants in the office; one of the five firm
attorneys are here on a rotating schedule. The woman I replaced
had been here about eight years. To my understanding, she quit to
take a job with better pay and benefits. The other woman here is a
younger woman (23) who had been here just over a year when I
started.
On my very first day, I was treated to advice on how to "deal" with
"Linda", one of the legal assistants at the main office.
Apparently, there is much love lost between the two, and I believe
that the woman I work with "grandfathered" the grudge from the ex
co-worker. I didn't "engage" in the manner that she expected, to
take her "side". I enjoy a good working relationship with Linda,
and I will add that Linda has never spoken a bad word about my
current co-worker, or ex, for that matter.
After I had been here about 3 weeks, I saw a message written by the
ex co-worker to my co-worker complaining that Linda and I were
getting "tight" and the ex co-worker advised my current co-worker
to "watch her back" and not to trust me. They communicate with
each other daily thru instant messenger, e-mail, and several phone
calls, and, in my opinion, if they didn't talk about me and the
firm, they would have little else to talk about.
I have taken on my tasks well, and have been given additional
responsibilities. If an attorney calls and asks for me, or is here
and works with me on an assignment, I get dirty looks, the silent
treatment, and she is almost instantly on the phone, calling the
ex-co-worker. I want to get along with her, and we have and can,
as long as the ex co-worker is silent and gone.
I have talked to a friend about this, and she seems to think that
the ex co-worker can't "let go" and wants to remain in some sort of
power over the office; while my co-worker is insecure in general.
(I might agree with the latter to an extent. I am 37, have
paralegal education, and am assisting in many aspects of law, while
my co-worker is 98% in one area only.) I am not sure how to handle
this situation.
I haven't confronted her about the behavior because I don't want to
make a bad situation worse, which I fear will happen. I have been
advised to talk to the attorneys, which I haven't done for two
reasons: they somewhat aggravate the situation by asking my co-
worker if she has heard from the ex; how is she doing, etc., and I
know there is a continuing relationship there as well in that the
ex co-worker emails and calls the attorneys on occasion. Any
suggestions?
Response: It sounds as if you have gotten yourself into a weird and
somewhat unprofessional situation. Office politics tend to be
risky — but to have the political shenanigans include someone who
is no longer part of the firm is particularly surprising.
Frankly, it sounds as if your friend gave you excellent advice.
The attorneys (or at least the managing partner or the attorney
responsible for administration of the firm) must be made aware of
two things: the first is that this political game is going on and
the second — that you find it wastes time, effort, and resources
that should be devoted to carrying on the firm’s professional
activities.
You have established your competence and value to the firm. Now
you ought to take it one step further and demonstrate your maturity
in terms of analyzing the office politics and letting the relevant
attorneys know you do not want to have anything to do with the
silliness.
Most companies of any kind do not allow employees to use email or
other company-owned communications media or equipment for personal
activities. The back-door communication that you describe goes
against this very sensible rule.
Before raising the issue with the lawyer(s) it would be wise to
analyze the impact of the office politics on the firm’s
productivity, team spirit, and profits. If you can demonstrate
that, say, two hours are wasted on this game every week, that means
the firm is paying X dollars per week to the game-players to do
something that has nothing to contribute to the firm’s well-being.
So be prepared before you undertake any discussions within the
firm: consider the interests of each of the stakeholders (including
the ex-co-worker) and how they are served by the current situation
— and how those interests would be impacted by any changes you
would recommend.
If the ‘ex’ has a demonstrable stake in the firm, be particularly
careful about your suggestions or comments. For example if she has
some kind of ownership — or her retirement fund from the firm gives
her meaningful influence over the business, then perhaps you should
take a look in another direction. Having demonstrated your
professionalism and value, it might make sense to see whether you
have a BATNA (Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement) that is
better than the current situation. If you can get a job that
doesn’t carry all the office politics baggage you might want to
make that move — or use the option as the proverbial two-by-four
board to hit your colleagues ‘upside the head’ to get their
attention.
Don’t sit quietly and allow this waste of time to continue. It
obviously annoys you — and it must cost the firm in ways that are
harmful in the long term.
Good luck,
Steve
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