Q & A Table of Contents
I Am Over 45 And Really Need This Job
From: Brenda, Bluefield, West Virginia
Question: I have been at my current position (Operations Manager) for over a year now. I was hired for inventory and assistant manager duties. Several persons already employed wanted this position, which was not made known to me up front. This caused tension with several older workers.
Six months after I started the job, it was decided that cutbacks of back-office would begin. I replaced a long-time worker who did not want to give up the position. Fellow workers did not understand this move either. No one cooperated including little or no training for me. The older workers were naturally worried about their security. My job duties consisted of management duties, inventory, shipping and receiving, and responsible for our major contractor of delivering windows and doors. I believed this to be an excessive workload. But when I would complain this fell on deaf ears. My general manager told me that I don't listen well -- which to me means when I disagree with him. I also am the only female manager, and the only one who punches a time clock. In spite of this, my first two evaluations of the year consisted of "excellent" and "good" in all criteria.
With all this stress, added work load and tension, I did make a lot of accuracy mistakes. I work over 50 hours a week, seldom take lunch, never miss work, and am never late. The past month I lost my father in a car accident. One week after the funeral, I received a verbal warning for paper mistakes. Two weeks later, I received a written warning I refused to sign.
I am so paranoid about making a mistake that I double and triple proof everything I do now. I do have very negative feelings for my superiors. I do not verbally express these, but I have a really hard time pretending to like someone when I don't. I don't really dislike my boss, I just seem to have no respect for him. Is this job hopeless? I feel so tired and stressed just trying to make this job work. I don't understand how things got this bad. I have never in my life been disciplined in a job! I take pride in my work ethic. I am at a loss on how to deal with this. I feel there are things below the surface other than my making paper errors. I believe I do not have the management style they had hoped for. I now have a good relationship with most of the employees, and believe in treating people fairly. Management here likes to keep people at odds with each other and my manager expects me to come to him with every mistake of other employees and goes to all employees to ask their personal opinions of each other’s work habits. I believe this leads to nonproductive gossip!
I am to receive a follow-up 30 day review. Do you believe I will be terminated or this is simply to see if I will conform to their wishes? Thank you for any advice you can give. I am over forty-five and really need this job.
Response: Venturing an opinion on your future in your job is beyond me; it sounds as if you have to do some significant questioning of yourself — and give thought to the interests of the other parties with interests in the outcome of your review.
You conclude your question saying you are over forty-five and need the job. However, as you describe the circumstances and your reactions to various aspects of your working environment, I wonder whether your short-term gains (having a job, pay, and whatever benefits are offered) balances off against the long-term damage it appears you are likely to suffer from the stress, overwork, and paranoia you describe. Given your description of the situation, you might want to think about doing a different kind of work in a different kind of environment.
If it is clear that you have no other potential job alternatives, then you need to do a serious job of prioritizing your interests when you participate in your review. Don’t just think about what you want, but also why it is important to you — and whether what you want is the only way to achieve your objectives.
In addition think about the interests of your boss, your co-workers, suppliers, customers, and other people or organizations who have something to gain or lose by a) having you on the job or b) having you perform specific functions. At your review, you should ask questions to do a reality check of the assumptions you make about those issues. What you learn by asking those questions can help you do a better job — and will show the person(s) conducting the review that you are very serious-minded about your responsibilities and the consequences of the work you do.
Do not go into the review focused on defending yourself against potential ‘charges’ you may be facing. A defensive attitude is not likely to inspire your reviewer to have greater confidence in you. Nonetheless you should think about the sorts of things about which you might be questioned or even criticized. What would you like to do better? What tools do you need for improved output?
Don’t volunteer excuses for issues that are not directly raised by your reviewer. If you are criticized, take a deep breath before responding; the expression we use is ‘think fast, talk slow’. Don’t take things personally — even if they are indeed issues for which you have personal responsibility. Think and act as a ‘company person’; how would/should the company analyze this job performance? You should control your emotions rather than letting your emotions control you.
If you perceive that your reviewer is looking for some sort of self-deprecation from you, think very hard about it before simply saying, “I’m sorry for letting you down.” How you view yourself will influence how they view you. Apologies are appropriate in negotiation — and should not take the ‘yes, but’ approach. You have to calculate the purpose of the apology — and take it only that far.
Life sounds altogether too exciting, on both the personal and professional levels. What you really need is some time off — if that is not possible, you should make it a priority to have your personal time structured to be truly rewarding so that you have at least that degree of a safety valve.
Good luck preparing yourself for the review. If you are well-prepared, you will do a better job.
Steve
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